10. You don't have much need for buying lottery tickets any more.
9. You always have a simple and effective method of turning away door-to-door salesmen. Without lying.
8. You make more of your time. Sailing versus obligations = sailing wins, every time.
7. You can eat dessert first, guilt-free. And still lose weight.
6. You always win the “You think you’ve had a crap day…” argument.
5. If you need to get out of a situation, you can always run to the bathroom.
4. You can always blame the tumor when you forget someone’s name.
3. When you go to a party, you know you’ve got the best drugs there.
2. Going to the hospital in NYC always means an EXCELLENT lunch afterwards!
1. You’re one of the few people who can make jokes about having cancer without being called an insensitive jerk.
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